I Hate Spam

I Hate SpamI don’t just hate Spam, I actually loathe it…There is a big difference between legitimate marketing practices and the use of Spam disguised as legitimate marketing. Spam is NOT a legitimate marketing tactic. Spam is unsolicited, illegal, unethical, intrusive, abusive, and rude. Furthermore, it is very costly both in terms of the time and money associated with implementing countermeasures to deal with Spam’s consistent attack on my privacy and productivity. In today’s post I put forth for your consideration my quite vehement objection to Spam…

How pervasive is Spam? Just in e-mail form alone I’ve seen estimates that more than 100 million Spam messages are sent each day. But Spam reaches far beyond e-mail…There is fax Spam, voicemail Spam, IM Spam, Mobile Spam, RSS Spam, Social Spam (Blog, Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, etc.) and the list goes on…I receive between 700 and 900 e-mails per day of which 150 +/- messages usually constitute some form of Spam. Sure, I use a variety of filters and blocking technology, but even so, between 30 and 60 e-mail Spam messages still get through. I don’t know about you, but the incessant policing of Spam cheats me of anywhere from 30 to 60 minutes a day, which when annualized constitutes a considerable direct cost to me…Perhaps worst of all, is that each month I will regrettably miss a few important messages that were either inadvertently filtered or just fell through the cracks. This would most certainly never happen if Spam were not as prevalent.

Spam clogs-up networks, perpetuates scams and fraud (my network of relatives of deceased third world dignitaries asking for my help in stewarding their considerable fortunes is actually quite impressive), wastes incredible amounts of time, spreads viruses, furthers rumors and innuendo, distributes pornography, and enables any number of other completely unproductive and harmful endeavors to thrive.

So far I’ve just commented on intentional Spam as classically defined, but what about well intentioned forms of communication that based upon a lack of judgment or etiquette actually have the same ultimate effect? I appreciate humor as much as the next person, but please, please remove me from your distribution lists passing along jokes and trivia items as I really don’t have time for these things. Oh, and while I’m at it, please don’t add me to group chats on Skype without checking with me first. I do thank you for all the attention, but I prefer to reserve all my various communications mediums for productive activity that I choose to participate in.

I believe Spam contributes to the moral and financial decay of our society more than most are willing to admit. I would encourage you to not partake in the use of Spam, and moreover, I would encourage you to report anyone who does.

I’m happily married and not interested in meeting lonely housewives. While I admit to getting on in years, I am in no need of Viagra or Cialis at this time. While I haven’t made the Forbes 400 list, I don’t desire to attempt to get there by participating in foreign lotteries, playing “pump and dump” penny stocks, or by being a distributor for someone’s network marketing endeavor.

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    Joe Johnson

    July 8, 2009 at 9:09 pm

    SPAM is a spiced meat product made by Hormel Foods, and a trademark thereof. Spam is the unsolicited bulk email you (and I myself) loathe.



    July 9, 2009 at 8:04 pm

    Thanks for catching the error Joe…But since I dislike them both I kill two birds with one stone.

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